Paranoia

I have always been a somewhat paranoid person. Any stare that lasts uncomfortably long, any car that slows down behind me, any footsteps I hear coming up from behind, any movement of shadow on the ground, is met by my suspicion and me glancing around erratically. BUT, my sister is even worse. Being frequenters of the MTA bus and rail system, we have every reason to be this way. There are always crazies on public transportation. I am not as paranoid as her and have ridden the system with a little bit of fearlessness because I figure no one would try anything when there's so many people around, but my sister remains skeptical. It's getting off and on the buses and rails that freak me out, especially at night. I have made many a trip to her work via the 720/920 Rapid bus at night and as soon as I get off, I speedwalk on over. I get off near the Vermont Red Line station, which is a hustling and bustling place but once you start heading east of there, the streets are pretty empty. Luckily there is a security guard on site at the entrance I go through but for those couple of blocks that I walk, my heart is racing. I have made this trip so many times and been okay, but due to the kidnapping/murder that has recently happened, I am pretty scared, especially for my sis. She is especially afraid because she walks over to the post office right around where this kidnapping took place so often AND it happened in broad daylight. If we can't even feel safe in broad daylight, then when can we?

So, what transpired next was a step toward our safety. My sister and I went to Big 5 yesterday and bought pepper spray. There was a sheriff that came to her work this past week to talk about safety measures. The best thing to do is out-crazy them and make a scene so as to get people's attention around you. Not only will I be doing that but I will be pepperspraying the crap out of them! The brand he recommended was Sabre (which is what we bought because Big 5 doesn't carry anything else anyway) and according to the packaging, NYPD carries the same. What I thought was great was that there were color choices. I bought the pink one because I think it would be most surprising for my attacker. "Hey what's that pink thing in your hand? AHHHH MY EYES!" We also chose the one that not only is a pepper spray but also includes tear gas and invisible UV marking dye because I fully intend to make any attackers cry and have them be shamefully marked to be easily identified later on. I don't suggest that you spray anyone you are suspicious of (especially because it is illegal to use it for anything other than self defense and defending yourself from awkward stares isn't really self defense, I feel), but it would be nice to keep it on hand when walking alone anywhere.